Archives for November 2021

No family is perfect and familial relationships can be really difficult and complicated. All families have arguments and fights every so often, and some even get to the point where people who were once close become estranged from each other. In order to avoid this happening to you, you should be prepared for some of the types of arguments you may have with your family at some point. Here are 4 common causes of disputes and disagreements within families.

Estate Planning

Oftentimes when the matriarch or patriarch of a family passes away, there can be nasty arguments among those left behind regarding the estate. In order to keep this from happening, many people opt to start estate planning early so that everything is clear, fair, and legal. Unfortunately, the planning process itself can also cause arguments. Make sure to protect your assets by having a lawyer present for all conversations you have with your children or other family members regarding your estate.

Illness

If someone in a family becomes gravely ill, everyone who loves that person will be under a lot of stress and therefore less equipped than usual to deal with things in a level-headed way. Normal conversations can become tense, and there can be major disagreements or fights over how best to care for the ill family member. Try to remember that you all have the ill person’s best interests at heart and in the end you all want the same things. This will help to keep you more calm during these hard times.

Children

When someone in your family has children, you may notice that everyone else in the family will often try to weigh in on the best ways to raise them. This can cause fights between family members when they ultimately disagree on decisions regarding the children. In these situations it is best to keep in mind that ultimately each parent (or legal guardian) gets to make the decisions when it comes to underage kids. Even though the Aunts, Uncles, Grandparents, etc. love the children very much, it is not their choice to decide where they go to school, what their bedtime is, and so on.

Significant Others

If you or someone else in your family is dating or married to someone that other family members do not like, this can be a huge cause of arguments. You may even be forced to choose between your significant other or your family, so it is a good idea to think very carefully about this before making any brash decisions. Listen to your family and consider what they have to say. At the end of the day, it is your choice who you decide to date or marry, but often your family is only acting out of love for you.

Family disputes are never fun and can be awkward, uncomfortable, and even devastating. Keep in mind that just because you are related to someone doesn’t mean you have to be tied to them forever, but that being said, do try to approach all arguments with a clear mind.

Although there are limited rights to visitation of grandparents, there are certain conditions that can be met that will permit visitation. An experienced Huntsville divorce lawyer can help advise you on whether a grandparent can petition the court for visitation rights and be successful. The grandparent visitation statute is established in AL Code § 30-3-4.2 (2016), where it states that visitation of a grandparent can be granted if the grandparent can prove that not permitting it would cause harm to their grandchild.

Harm in this case is defined as “a finding by the court, by clear and convincing evidence, that without court-ordered visitation by the grandparent, the child’s emotional, mental, or physical well-being has been, could reasonably be, or would be jeopardized.” This can be a difficult standard to prove, but not impossible.

How AL Code § 30-3-4.2 (2016) Applies

As mentioned above, harm, as defined by AL Code § 30-3-4.2 is an important determinant for visitation rights. To that end, grandparents are able to file an action in court where their grandchild resides or they can file a motion to intervene with any state court before issues of custody arise in order to establish reasonable visitation rights. It is important to note that certain conditions apply:

1. An action for a divorce or legal separation has been filed by the parents, or the marriage has been severed by death or divorce.

2. A child has been born out of wedlock and the petitioner is a maternal grandparent of the child.

3. The child was born out of wedlock, the petitioner is a paternal grandparent of the child, and paternity has been legally established.

4. An action to terminate the parental rights of a parent or parents has been filed or the parental rights of a parent has been terminated by court order; provided, however, the right of the grandparent to seek visitation terminates if the court approves a petition for adoption by an adoptive parent, unless the visitation rights are allowed pursuant to Section 26-10A-30.

If visitation rights are challenged, or rebutted, the petitioning grandparent can argue that they have a significant and viable relationship with the child. To establish a significant and viable relationship to the court, they must demonstrate evidence of the following kind:

1. The child lived with the petitioning grandparent for at least six consecutive months either with or without a parent within the three years prior to filing the petition.

2. The child lived with the grandparent as a caretaker on a regular basis for at least six consecutive months within the three years prior to filing the petition.

3. The petitioning grandparent has had frequent or regular contact with the child for at least twelve consecutive months that resulted in a strong and meaningful relationship with the child within the three years prior to filing the petition.

Alabama law states that “as a matter of public policy, this section (AL Code § 30-3-4.2 (2016)) recognizes the importance of family and the fundamental rights of parents and children.” But by making a path for grandparents to have a continued role in their grandchildren’s lives, a glimmer of hope remains.